Seesawing between laughter and tears, colleagues who gathered this week to celebrate former Morristown Council President Sandi Mayer recalled a loyal friend with a sharp wit and a penchant for speaking her mind.

“Sandi was a bad-ass, fearless. You know, Beyoncé has this alter-ego, Sasha Fierce. We had Sandi Fierce,” said Amalia Duarte, Morris County’s Democratic chairperson.

Gathering at the Jewish Federation of Metrowest to celebrate the life of former Morristown Councilwoman Sandi Mayer, April 16, 2024. Photo by Kevin Coughlin

About 150 people shoehorned into a room at the Jewish Federation of Greater MetroWest NJ in Whippany on Tuesday to remember Mayer, who died unexpectedly this month at age 61. She had appeared to be rebounding from open-heart surgery last December.

Rabbi David Tobin welcomed an audience that included a stand-in for Rep. Mikie Sherrill (D-NJ); state Sen. Anthony M. Bucco (R-25th Dist.); present and former elected officials from Morristown, Morris Township and Parsippany; volunteers who served with Mayer on the county Democratic Committee, the gun reform group Moms Demand Action, and the Morristown Shade Tree Commission; and members of Mayer’s family.

The public saw flashes of Sandi Fierce during Mayer’s lone term representing Morristown’s Fourth Ward.

Her paternal grandparents were murdered in the Holocaust; she denounced Nazi- and Confederate-bedecked Jan. 6 insurrectionists as “cockroaches.”

Morris Democratic Chairperson Amalia Duarte eulogizes former Morristown Councilwoman Amalia Duarte, April 16, 2024. Photo by Kevin Coughlin

In a bitter clash with Mayor Tim Dougherty’s administration over its handling of a proposed hospital expansion near her Parsons Village neighborhood, she vowed to be “hell in heels” to keep everyone apprised.

After losing her council seat last year, Mayer threw herself into creating a Jewish Caucus for the county Democratic organization.

“I deeply admired that, because it’s easy to curl up in a ball and just say, ‘to hell with it.’  It took a lot of courage,” said Duarte, who has won and lost elections, too.

(Politics is a blood sport, and grudges die hard. One of Mayer’s friends quietly asked the mayor and Councilman Chris Russo, who primaried Mayer last year, to leave the ceremony. “I respect that,” Russo said later. “I respect (Mayer’s) four years of service.”)

‘JOY AND CAMARADERIE’

“Sandy was magic,” said Shade Tree Commission Chairwoman Kristin Ace, describing her fellow volunteer as a strong, spunky dynamo in a world that does not celebrate strong women. There was compassion, too, which “lifted me out of the abyss more than once… No one else will fill her sassy pink heels.”

Always first on the dance floor, Mayer sported enough shoes and boots to stock a fashion store. And she wasn’t shy about critiquing companions’ style. (“Shouldn’t those be donkeys?” she needled Duarte, who ventured out –once– wearing elephant-print pants.)

Mayer grew up in the White Meadow Lake section of Rockaway Township, graduating from Morris Hills High School in 1979.

Lisa Pieciak met her a few years later, when Mayer worked at the front desk of the Four Seasons Racket and Health Club. Mayer organized after-work dance trips on Thursdays and Fridays. Other adventures included sitting among priests cheering for Seton Hall during March Madness, and rooting in the freezing cold for the Giants at a 1987 playoff.

Sandi Mayer got news of her 2019 Morristown council victory after hiking around this volcano in New Zealand.

Every moment was filled with “joy and camaraderie,” Pieciak said.

Mayer resided in Morristown for more than 30 years, and worked for an accounting firm. She liked exotic vacations: New Zealand volcanoes, the Panama Canal.

Another favorite pastime was chasing Jersey politicos to pose for pictures. She was like a big-game hunter on a selfie safari, as attested by a photo montage assembled by Kate Barry.

Barry accompanied Mayer to Newark last fall to hear Woodward and Bernstein of All the President’s Men fame. She cherished Mayer as an attentive confidante.

“She was very positive, even when she was negative,” Barry said with a smile.

Mayer’s sister, Valerie Mayer Goldman, came up from Delray Beach, FL., even though Mayer fell out with relatives many years ago. Goldman was surprised to find family photos everywhere in Mayer’s co-op, and was impressed by Tuesday’s testimonials.

“She had all these wonderful people surrounding her…it’s wonderful that she found this whole family of her own,” Goldman said of her sister.

Theresa Piliero and Fern Wolkin of Moms Demand Action remember Sandi Mayer, April 16, 2024. Photo by Kevin Coughlin

Over the years, Mayer volunteered at Dierdre’s House, a Morris County center for children who are victims of abuse. With Moms Demand Action, her outrage about gun violence never wavered; she pepped up her comrades when their spirits flagged, said Fern Wolkin.

They returned the favor when Mayer was recuperating from a heart attack, and surgery, last December. Wolkin quoted a Facebook post by Mayer:

“I’ve learned in the past few weeks how awesome my village is. I’ve learned who are true friends and who aren’t. I’ve never realized my circle of friends were just so real and wanted to be there for me. I am and will forever be grateful and humbled. You all know who you are, and I love each of you for your kindness, thoughtfulness, and just showing up.”